Fresh out of college. Young. Youthful. Inexperienced. Immature. Curious. Not enough adjectives can define what we were, on that 17th day of July 2005. Oh we were scared alright. We were scared of what happens next. The 72 of us. But we did not let one percent of that emotion, on our faces. We thought we were men, and men arent scared. To be honest, we really werent that scared of the future. We were scared of tears. Tears that might just start dripping. We could not let that happen. We did not let that happen.
Its been five years now. Thats a lot of time. Out of the 72, some have been victim to the system. The rest of us, we are still here. Throughout this time, we have lived together. We know what we are made of. What defines us. We know each others likes. We know each others choices. Much like brothers, to be fair. We have seen each other cry and we have seen each other be joyous. We have seen each others as brothers. We have lived together, like brothers.
After all this time, I dont blame anyone at all. The distances that have been etched, are as much as fault mine as theirs. They have loved me their full share, and I have tried to do the same. Magar hamara qasoor nahe hai na. Hum bachay gaye thay, bilkul bachay. What ever moralities of the outside world we know, we were taught in the outside world. No preparatory lectures, no field exercises. Direct experience.
Who gets the blame ?
We dont belong to flashy groups of friends. What little friends we had, are mere obligations now. We are each others friends now. Very rarely we regret not knowing the norms of friendship. As how the culture prevails. We mess up. We fall. Because we were programmed for one purpose and one purpose only. And we serve that purpose and we feel honored to be doing it. This is the only cover up we have, the only hope that drives us.
After all being said and done. Given the opportunity to go back in time. I would not change ONE thing about this life. The lessons that have been taught by this brotherhood, are ones unknown by many.